I went into Albertson's the other day specifically for peanut butter and jelly. None of that crunchy organic unsalted nonsense they sell at Trader Joe's (my usual grocery store), but some real unhealthy, processed, bad-for-you Jif peanut butter. And cheap no-name raspberry jelly. So I'm walking down the PB&J aisle and a see a couple standing in front of the jelly.
"I really want this one, but the other one is cheaper," she says.
"So get the one you want," her boyfriend/fiance/husband says.
"But it's like a dollar fifty more expensive."
I'm now wondering why this sounds so familiar.
"So then get the cheaper one. They're the same flavor, right?"
"But the other one is seedless. I like seedless."
"So then get the seedless one."
"Hmm. Maybe if I get a different flavor...."
At this point I can see that the guy getting visibly irritated. He's rolling his eyes and leaning heavy on the cart, willing his girlfriend to make a decision.
"Can you just please choose a damn jelly so we can move on?" he says.
"But last time I bought jelly because it was on sale, it just sat in the cabinet."
"SO THEN BUY THE ONE YOU WANT!"
And then it hits me: holy shit, I'm witnessing a real life jelly fight!
Highlight of my day by FAR!